i come to these places with myself at times, where everything within me is raging against the other piece of me (which i am trying my best to decrease).
and i feel frustration.
you know when there is a lion inside of you - or perhaps a river - and it's meant to come out, but you keep it within.
and you think you are doing what is right by keeping it inside, when truly all it wants to do is gush out!
i have been doing that. keeping the treasures of my heart locked in. keeping the desires inside, and preventing them to come out.
i feel like the creativity inside is dying to become alive (how ironic).
i feel like the words inside are craving for a home.
i feel like the dreams within are moments away from reality, but can't seem trust they are.
it's a constant fight.
and sometimes, we get too caught up with wanting to win, that we forget to just be.
we forget to live.
and this is what always gets me.
maybe the whole reason one side of me is fighting with the other is to keep me from living...
often, it wins.
i'm so consumed by winning, that in the process, i lose.
oh, sneaky one.
i come to realize that no matter the fight inside, i need to keep running. i need to keep breathing. and i need to keep living.
i need to do the things i love, dream and do, document everything, be in the moment.
and no matter the pain, there is joy nonetheless.
there is joy,
note to self: do not stop dreaming. dream, and go do.