Thursday, December 17, 2009

what happens when the soul gets messy...


Blog: "Well, i haven't seen you in a while..."
Me: "yeah, i know eh!?"

this would be a conversation between my blog and i...if it were real.
...yeah...

so a lot has been happening this month - not to mention we are DECEMBER 17 - just about a week away from christmas.
talk about craziness.

it's so hard talking about 108283 different topics in one post; i usually like to focus on one thing.
but i guess this one will be a tad different...

first of all, schooling for me next year is set. yes - i have been accepted into OCAD without having applied yet. God most definitely works in mysterious ways, and when you trust, he honors : )

...words i should believe myself...hm.
trust has most definitely been the theme of this month - if not year.
...if not life.

but what i mean is - trusting God and what that means has been something i've been challenged with this month...and i've been finding out (in a matter of days) that if my hope is not fully in God, i will be let down.

it's so easy to put our hope in people, in relationships, in dreams, and goals...
but the result will somehow crumble down, because the foundation is not stable.

...i've come to realize i try to avoid getting too close to my soul (heart/feelingss and thoughts) because it just scares me to get messy with it; to explore it and bring it into the light; to expose it and find myself with no solutions to the mess.

this may make total sense, or i might just not be making much sense at all...but one thing i do know is we all face steps in our journeys we don't know how to reach, or rocks we stumble on and need help getting up from.
i do know that we all have desires in our hearts that some we honestly don't know what to do with - they may seem impossible or just not right - and we find ourselves battling alone.
i know for sure that each and one of us come to points where decisions need to be made where the roads split either to freedom or to enslavement.

and sometimes (or always), it appears we are walking alone.
but Daddy wants me to remind you - as he is reminding me - he is our first and true love.
he is to be our everything. in whom our full hope is in.
he wants you to know that he has never let go of your hand; since you were born.
and at this very moment, your hand is tightly in his.

he's taking care of you, child...as he is taking care of me. it's something we need to live each day by. reminding ourselves that all things happen for our good.
Daddy knows it all - and we don't.
he is to be trusted, completely.

in the next few days, i will be writing about christmas, as it is so quickly approaching...
otherwise, the job is well. the snow has fallen. the friends are marvellous. the heart is fragile.
switchfoot - jan 22. sketch volunteering to be talked about. church ministry. and speaking gig.

all in all, i am still learning to breathe...

i dearly love you all - every single one of you. you are precious.

melody.

1 comment:

Donna said...

"but the result will somehow crumble down, because the foundation is not stable" ...so good. you're so cool, keep going